Something Left Behind

Time is a funny thing as wise men as well as the not so smart remark
To the memories, we have etched upon our very souls with fire and blood
And yet we come home to a place that is as foreign to us as the one we just left
To family and friends who remained behind in peaceful ignorant bliss
Cannot help but wonder why we are often silent or suddenly remorseful

Grateful for that blessed ignorance we are for if they knew what we carried inside of us
The horrors and sorrows of the death of our last shreds of innocent so dearly held
We mourn more than just brothers and sisters lost for what seems forgotten reasons
It cuts with a scalpel’s sharpness the pain of those memories returning unbidden and unwanted
It comes at the worst moments and places for it is never at times when you are strongest

The painful recollection something of yourself is lost  forever in that blood-soaked hell
A part of you that will never come home and all you want is peace to lay down at indeed rest
The slightest thing can bring those memories back as fresh as the moment you lived them
To feel that knife wound to twist within you once again is unbearable, yet you cannot break

To break is to yield ground to those horrors within you and to admit your failure to silence it
Those of us who feel this way, those who can feel alone in a room full of people they dearly love
Know that we do not stop loving you but are back in that time and place that you can never dwell
We left something behind there in that time and place….



A piece of our soul